Dark Side

The world is full of people, and many would have you believe that we are different. But I believe underneath it all we are fundamentally the same. We live, we breathe, we love, we learn, and in the end we pass away.

None of these commonalities, however are relevant for the moment, or for my purposes. What i want to talk about is the line from Kelly Clarkson's song "Dark Side". She sings "Everybody's got a dark side."

Lately those words have rung so true with me, you wouldn't believe it. Dark sides can be both good in bad. They can help you truly get to know who you are. There are many sides to one person all of them make you who you are. I have fun, I can be a party person on occasion. I can be the reader, who stays in on weekends with a drink and a book. I can be the friend. I can be the sister, I can be the cousin. I can be the helping hand. But more important I can also be dark. I can lose my self in sadness. I can let it swallow me, and creep into my world with out even meaning to.

Everyone has a dark side. A part of ourselves that rubs everyone the wrong way. A part that sometimes we wish we could hide from the world. I know I wish i could hide it. I have a dark side, I won't discuss it, and i wont lay it out on the table. That isn't the point of this blog. The point is I have a dark side. I can admit it. Can you? Can you face it? Can you even see it?

The past can hold a lot of sadness of darkness. It is unfortunate that the things we want to forget always lurk in the shadows and appear when we least expect it or want it. I was falling in love when it happened for me.

But having a dark side is normal. You can't run from it. The only way I see to deal with it, is to face it. To walk right up to the monster and face it. So here I am facing mine. I've talked it through and for the first time in a very long time I feel like my eyes are open, and i feel like I am happy again. I can't remember the last time I felt this much like myself.

Know this though, if someone, a boyfriend for example can't get past and accept your dark side, then they are not meant for you. We would not be here, as us, functioning like we do if we weren't meant to.

Don't worry I'm not starting to spew religious psychobabble. I mean we allowed things to affect us for a reason. Some part of us made a choice to be a certain way.
So look at yourself, not that I've had you look at the world and open your eyes to it, it might be time to look inward.

Until tomorrow, well until later I guess, I its two am and time for me to rest my head.